As I’ve posted very recently, BDSM has taken a back seat to other things in my life due to distance from my pet, and the agreement that we have which dictates if both of us aren’t together, I’m not to practice with anyone else. This sounds like a switcheroo and might cause people to wonder who’s exactly in charge of this relationship. TBH, we both are. It’s not all she gives and I take, it’s a yin/yang sort of thing that for us makes it work with the distance, and so far we’ve managed 7 plus years, so who’s arguing with success?
That being said, there have also been other issues in 2024 that made getting together all but impossible. As stated in that post, we’re hoping 2025 will bring a bit more in the way of travel, and play experience. If nothing else, we have a new toy that I acquired recently that we’d like to test out. I’ll be referencing it soon so it will just have to stay a mystery until you find out about it.
Even while in-person play is not on the table, there are other things that we can do even while long distance. We maintain our roles in conversation (Master/pet) so that we can keep that in check. We tried doing it the other way using one another’s names in conversation but it lacked the oomph we both needed to keep things fresh. Otherwise, it all drops down to a vanilla relationship and at that point, it all becomes almost meaningless.
At one time we discussed remote play (self-flagellation et al) but neither of us believed that it would feed the other’s needs. If you’re hitting yourself and someone is observing over video or listening over the phone, it loses a lot of the meaning of the action. Too, remote directing someone to hit themselves for your enjoyment (at least to me) seems rather silly. They’re going to know what’s coming, it removes the anticipation as well as the element of surprise, so why bother for the sake of a few endorphins? Or a momentary lift that will only remind us both of the distance. I say meh, and no thanks.
Finally, my pet has the option to wear her collar, or not as she sees fit regarding her body. I know for some that might be unheard of, but with the distance involved, it can be an issue if her skin becomes irritated, or she wishes to go out with friends (or family) and it might clash with what she’s wearing at that juncture. At one time she would ask before swapping it out, but I gave her the autonomy to make that decision as the need arose. There was a time when she hadn’t worn it for many months and then very recently put it on again. I’d gotten used to not seeing it on her and it surprised me that she was wearing it again. Pleased, certainly but surprised. She said she missed having it on. Nothing wrong with that!
That’s about all for now. More to come soon. I’m starting to find the joy in writing again. Even if I keep going over the same topics.