Levels of Control

strings.jpgOver the last week or so I’ve been in the dark about a couple of things that my girl has been experiencing.  In her defense, she generally knows what happens when I find out about things of this nature.  I try to fix them.  I’m a guy, its engrained in my make-up.  I find a problem, I seek a solution.  And of course since nothing in this world is free, it generally takes money to accomplish it.

I have to tread carefully here, as I don’t want to reveal too much, or cause embarrassment for my girl, but one of the issues is with her vehicle.  And there have been issues with it before, which I’ve taken upon myself to fix and pay for out of my own pocket.  Yes, she’s promised to repay me and at some point I expect she will, but when one purchases a vehicle that is over 10 years old, there are going to be problems that will crop up more often than not.  But when problems arise, she has a tendency (as I have with certain things) to put them on the back burner.  To procrastinate, either because the funds are not there to repair it, or it’s easier to pretend the situation doesn’t exist.  Either way, that’s a recipe for disaster, and we’re in that realm right now.  I fear greatly right now that she’s going to be in a horrific accident, and the legal system is going to be involved because of it.  Yes, things are really that dire, as was revealed to me yesterday while we were talking about it.  When I asked her how bad it was on a scale of 1 to 10, I figured at the very least she was going to say an 8.  When she revealed it was “way past a 10…” I was understandably a couple of things.  Irate was one of them.

And of course, to make matters worse, she tried to smooth it over.  “It’ll be ok, Daddy”.  Ooo, I really detest that sentiment when applied to something of this nature!  It’s NOT going to be ok unless something is done!  But, she knows that, and she understands better than I do what her financial situation is.  Yes, I know all too well how much wages have stagnated over the past 30 years here in the US.  Certainly in great contrast to the cost of living that keeps going up and up.  I know it’s not going to change much for the better so long as Congress is bought and paid for by the wealthy interests.  Those of us on the bottom are going to continue to be worked to death, and paid a paltry sum for our efforts.  Health care costs, in spite of insurance, is going to continue to take a large chunk of our paychecks, since there’s little interest in changing the way health care is paid for in the US.

Ugh, off on a tangent there, that’s another post for another time.

I want to be clear, I trust my girl.  I want the best for her.  I know I’m a ways away from her and can’t be there to look after her in person.  It’s just not something that’s possible right now.  I hope in the future that will change, but the relationship we have right now, is the best that we can manage.  She wants me to have ALL the control, but it’s not something that I can do from this distance.  In person, sure I could keep BOTH hands on the wheel and be sure that things are taken care of, paid for and so on.  Right now, that’s just not possible.  It grates on me, but I have to weather it.  And I am.  Mostly.